The report is in

"Learn more English, be nicer to Muslims, get better informed."

Riots in the 514

The Canadiens beat the Bruins 5-0 here in Montreal last night and have advanced to the second round of the playoffs. This is big enough news to kick-start a bit of a riot not too far from our house, right by Matt's school. Some police cars were burned, and some shops were broken into. You can see a photo essay here.

I also watched some videos of the scene on YouTube, and more than anything it was the comments that pissed me off. The riot was blamed not on drunken hockey fans but on immigrants, blacks, Arabs, and anglos. That's right; it was all my fault. I'm an anglo immigrant. I have no right to be here, and I am to blame for all post-hockey game riots and anything else that tarnishes the good name of Montreal or la belle province.

I know that not all Montrealers and Quebecers are as ignorant, blatantly racist and inhospitable as some of the commenters on YouTube (because, really, judging society by YouTube comments is very sad), but the truth is that that same ignorance, racism, and arrogance exist in a very real way here, and being a part of the unwelcome minority gets to be exhausting sometimes.

Smack!

And that is how you spank Roy Williams. Rock chalk!

Beautiful crime-free Montreal

Looks like Karla Homolka has moved to the Carribbean.

Poop back and forth forever

You don't often see poop in the news.

Oh those crazy advertisers!

I just read this news story about an ad encouraging economic development in South Korea that uses a picture of the Calgary skyline. My first reaction was to think that the art director/designer who picked the photo didn't know what city it was and didn't think anyone else would know either. But the CEO of Calgary Economic Development thinks otherwise. Says he, "This is a testament to our city and what we're doing here." I wonder what the art director's boss had to say about the whole thing.

4th of July in Canada

Today has been rainy and cool. In short, crappy weather for the 4th of July. Even if there were supposed to be fireworks tonight, they would have been rained out. Our inaugural use of the football helmet mini grill coincided with the heaviest rains of the day (and the best crash of thunder I've heard in this country yet, which caused me to pump my fist in the air and cry out, "WOOOO!"). The grilled corn was tasty if not local, as were the traditional Independence Day root beer floats, but it was just not the same spending the 4th of July indoors on a gray, rainy day.

So I spent the day researching Canadian brand presence. Actually, I didn't. But I did just come across this article on the CBC website that lists the top ten iconic Canadian brands. They are the following:

1. Cirque du Soleil


2. Ski-Doo


3. CBC


4. Roots


5. Toronto Maple Leafs


6. Montreal Canadians


7. Calgary Stampede


8. IMAX


9. CN Tower


10. Terry Fox

I'm not sure how accurate this list is, as the agency who compiled the list admits that these were "not necessarily the most valuable iconic brands, but were the special favourites of our panel." I guess as an American, and therefore an outsider, I shouldn't speculate on iconic Canadian brands. But as an American, and this being the 4th of July, I feel it is my patriotic duty to butt in and have my say. And my say is thus: I didn't know Ski-Doo, IMAX, and Roots were Canadian companies. Upon arriving in Montreal, I was in fact confused as to why all these Canadians had Roots logos all over everything when the US Olympic athletes had Roots logos on their outfits in Athens.

I have much to learn about Canada. But not today. Today is for stars and stripes! I'm going to see if I can find fireworks on TV.

BOOM!

This morning I was lying in bed, telling myself that I needed to get up and get to work but complaining that I was so tired and no one was expecting me anywhere and the bed was so comfy and I could sleep just a little longer when BOOM! An explosion! Up I jumped! Looking out the window, we couldn't see anything out of the ordinary except a bunch of people gathering on the sidewalk and a little boy excitedly shouting, "Fire! Fire!" I threw on some clothes and went outside but by the time I got down there, there was no fire left. I spoke with the maintenance lady from our building who was putting out the trash, and she told me what happened: two manhole covers exploded open! One of them was under a car at the time, and the car was thrown off the road. There was fire coming out of the now-open holes in the ground, (although by the time I got downstairs, it was just smoke) so she thought it was a gas pipe explosion. Our street is now closed off, and there are firemen everywhere, although they don't seem to be doing a whole lot. (And their trucks have been idling this whole time! Damn energy wasters!) I don't think we are allowed to leave our building without being escorted by the firemen, as we are in the danger zone, roped off by orange (not just yellow!) tape.

Concussions are a gateway drug

This headline really cracks me up.